By: Hettie Basil Lighttower

T’is the season to be jolly! I hope you are finding jolly aka joy in your days this time of year. It seems December is a month of upheaval. Many families lose loved ones this time of year, and then there are many births this time of year. December causes us to be glad the stresses of one year are over but also can cause pressure and guilt of goals not met. Then we try to find our redemption in January. A NEW YEAR. A NEW START!
Lots of topsy turvy emotions. Colder temperatures seclude us indoors, shorter days with less daylight can be depressing and unmotivating. But then all the festive Christmas lights and decorations and parties are uplifting. We even like to make special trips to tour the area and see all that we can see in the creative sparkles of twinkly lights. Dinners and gatherings and gift exchanges can be bright and exciting. We ponder the birth of the Light of the World and have motivation to be better, do better and love more.
I mean there is so much going on in December emotionally, spiritually, obligationally, reflectively that our minds are on all levels of contemplation and this month always seems to just fly by. We wonder where it went and how did we get to a new year already. And if we are the good traditional ones doing all the baking and catering, God bless us as we scurry about to make all things just right for all our people! LOL
In light of this time of year being a reflective time of year where we judge ourselves for falling short on so many levels, I’d like to talk about fault versus fate. Two little words. Two powerful words. Two life-changing words in most cases.
If you have ever made a mistake or a decision and you know it was your fault aka your action of catalyst and things in your life took a drastic turn because of it for the worst, you will relate to this segment. And I have a sneaky suspicion that that includes all of you. If you have done any living in this life, made decisions and then had unexpected results or consequences then this may interest you.
Have you heard the phrase when life gives you lemons, make lemonade? Well sometimes fate is the underlying result of our faults. There may have been decisions or choices you have made that at the time seemed harmless, then the consequences showed otherwise, then the lessons and wisdom that you incurred and new path you found yourself on could not have otherwise happened. And on this new path in this new direction you were able to accomplish things or experience things you never ever fathomed for yourself. Your life was enhanced in ways it would not have been. But due to that thing that was your fault, it was.
And of course there is the phrase, God works in mysterious ways. And some of those mysterious ways find a pathway through the faults we have that were actually fate. The thing is, if it is pre-planned and destined for us to experience, because God has a plan for us, then perhaps our fates are fates not faults.
The reason I am rambling about all of this is to encourage you to forgive you. Sure, God forgives you especially if you have asked Him to. But you also have to forgive yourself for any faults or shortcomings. It is not for us to judge. Even if it means you judging YOU. It is still judging and you don’t deserve constant condemnation from yourself. Find the good in the new direction you have been catapulted in. Don’t wallow in regret or worse yet self-loathing.
We don’t always have all the answers and certainly not all knowledge of all the possible outcomes of every fractal of decision we ever made. There may be times in reflection and self examination when we really don’t know why we did what we did, or why we said what we said or why we thought what we thought. But somehow we are now enjoying a refreshing iced lemonade with just the right amount of sugar. And had those lemons not been squeezed into our glass, we would not know the joy of this sweet tart drink!
Life more times than not finds a way to put us in a direction or on a path we never could have imagined for ourselves. And those mysterious ways of how we got there or “here” are sometimes through our own “bad choices” aka faults. And although the outcome was not what we would have wished upon ourselves, the places or positions we find ourselves in are really magical and profound in a completely different way.
Embrace your faults and realize it must have been fate. Fate is something we cannot change. It is like a set marker of what we were meant to experience or attain. Perhaps you don’t believe in fate. Maybe you have another theory and know a deeper understanding of happenings in life. I would love to hear them. I actually have a few more deductions of my own concerning fate or “things that are just meant to be”.
Enjoy your Christmas and all my best to you in the New Year. And remember next week(Christmas week) We will not have a weekly paper. This is it until January 2nd. So, you will have to read this twice and think on it twice as hard.
What are your thoughts about all this? Send in your notions and comments to [email protected]. Kindness is contagious~*